Here are five tips from a successful second year college student to anyone having trouble getting those good grades in higher education. Follow these rules and your professors will love you! And you are sure to get a great grade in every class!
Tip 1
Make sure you arrive late to class on a regular basis. This will show your professor that even though you obviously have better things to be doing, you still care enough about their class to get there no matter how much time you have to cut out of your daily moisturizing routine or reality TV line-up. They will appreciate your willingness to sacrifice your valuable personal time to come hear what they have to say.
Tip 2
Vigorously argue with the professor about whether or not they are correct on any and every topic covered in class. This will show that you care. That you have a burning desire to understand. However, you don’t want to question his or her expertise, so make sure that all your arguments are poorly founded and completely wrong. Your professor will appreciate the care you have for their ego. They will admire your flawless self-confidence that you so readily and enthusiastically question authority. They will be awed by your moxy. By doing this, you will be making sure that the professor will remember your name and face, so that when it comes to grading assignments the professor will remember that you were so passionate about learning that you took the time to argue for clarification on behalf of the rest of the class by allowing no statement to go unquestioned and your grade will reflect this.
Tip 3
Do not proof read papers or assignments. This shows the professor that you acknowledge that they are more savvy in their fields than you will ever be, and because of this you don’t have the right to feign expertise by turning in an obnoxious, pretentious, correctly formatted, pseudo-professional lie. They will be flattered by your obvious submission to his or her academic superiority, and take the extra time to correct your work, and edit it into a legible addition to the college world.
Tip 4
In compunction with Tip 1, alternately do not show up to class at all. This shows the professor that you have equal respect for the value of their personal time. So much respect that you are willing to pay tuition, then not show up to a class so that the professor has to spend less time teaching in class, and more time to devote to their hobbies like reading academic journals and grading papers.
Tip 5
Make sure you wait until the last minute to ask for clarification in the syllabus or on an assignment. There is no better way to show that you respect your professors valuable time, and his or her work obligations, than by waiting until the day before something is due to ask for help. This will show your professor that you respected them enough to spend the three weeks since this was assigned trying to muddle through it yourself, even though you never understood it. He or she will admire your independence and rush to get you everything you’ll need to get the assignment completed on time—they might even give you an extension!
